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The Yoyogod's Oracle of Uneartly Wisdom is absolutely Guaranteeed to be just as effective as any other online oracle or fortune telling program. It is also guaranteed to be at least 90% as accurate as any fortune teller, astrologer, palmist, psychic, medium, ortarot card reader you may consult in the real world. Remember though, the fortune may not apply to you, it may apply to a friend, relative, casual acquaintance, or neighbor. Also, some of the answers are only metaphors, so they may not literaly mean what they seem to mean. Unless they say to give me all your money or buy something from one of my links, then they are being literal.
If you beleive in my oracle, or wish to learn more about mediums, psychics, fortune telling, and stuff, the see my list of books on that kind of thing. I guarantee that if you buy one, I'll be at least as enriched by it as you, because I'll get a cut of the profits.